Branchburg Township School District

If your child behaves in one or more of the following ways, it might indicate that he or she bullies others. If you observe these behaviors, you might want to spend some extra time talking with your child about his or her behavior and schedule a conference to talk about your concerns with school staff:
 

• Teasing, threatening or kicking other children;
• Being hot-tempered, hyperactive, impulsive or having a hard time following rules;
• Being aggressive toward adults;
• Acting tough or showing no sympathy for others;
• Being involved in other antisocial behavior, such as vandalism or theft; and
• Engaging in controlling or dishonest behavior.

Children bully others for many different reasons. Parents can develop more effective responses to stop their children from bullying if they know the reasons for the behavior. Some things that might contribute to bullying behavior include the following (adapted from the Center for Safe School’s Pennsylvania Bullying Prevention Toolkit):
 

• Control and power – Many children bully in an attempt to have control over others or to get power within a group. Providing children with stability and the freedom to make some of their own decisions can help in dealing with this issue. Discussing fair limits for their behavior with your children and putting these limits into effect time after time is another way to address this issue. Teaching these children acceptable social skills and ideas for cooperating with others also is important.
• Peer attention – Children often receive positive attention for their bullying behavior. When other children laugh at or join in the bullying, children are supported for their bullying behavior. This may be addressed by keeping track of your children’s friends and activities, and by talking about the difference between giving attention to others for good and bad behavior.
• Learned behavior and indifferent attitudes toward bullying – Parents’ attitudes toward peer aggression and bullying can have a major effect on their children’s behavior. If parents - through their inaction or action - approve of bullying, (which can include allowing their children to bully one another) the children may mistakenly think that bullying is acceptable behavior and a normal part of growing up. Parents should take action when they see bullying behavior and be clear that it will not be tolerated.
• Bias issues – Some bullying is driven by personal prejudice or social norms that reject certain groups. A listing of groups that are especially susceptible to bullying is provided in the section of this guide titled Children at Risk for Being Bullied (pages 26-27). If parents suspect one of their children is prejudiced towards a certain group(s), they can help by talking with the child about the reasons for it. Parents also can have their children participate in activities and counseling that build empathy and respect for others. A listing of activities is provided in the section of this guide titled Bullying Prevention Activities that Parents and Children Can do Together (pages 25-26).
• Being a victim – Bullying is part of a vicious cycle. Some children may bully others because they are victims of bullying. If you suspect one of your children is bullying another person(s), consider whether or not they have ever shown any signs of being a victim of bullying (see the section titled Signs that Your Child is Being Bullied on page 27). Think about whether your child is a member of any group(s) that is especially susceptible to bullying. If the child who bullies also is a victim, contact the school about your concerns, and inform your child that bullying others is not the way to stop bullies.